Introduction
Before we begin this descent into hell, I’d like to make a few things perfectly clear:
- I am not suicidal in any way, the title of this article is a joke. I’m looking at you, Hillary.
- This website is not a safe space, and this article is both crass and opinionated. I make no apologies for that. Typically, I tend to write without inserting my own opinions into things (as much as I can) but I’ve designated Fridays as the day that I will now be posting opinion pieces and fun articles.
The Countdown
Who needs North Korea when you have ordinary citizens willing to make propaganda for big pharma and career politicians for internet points? Videos will be ranked from bad to worse, and the scoring system is one I made up while writing this. Enjoy.
Shout-out to the always-hilarious Twitter account @LibsofTikTok for putting in the work and scrolling through deranged leftist TikToks so we don’t have to!
Honorable Mention – Nobody Thinks You’re A Republican, I Promise
While this is on the tame side, it’s the impressive combination of virtue signaling, the dirty mask, and the unkempt green hair that gives this one an honorable mention. While the humor is basic and unoriginal, overall this TikTok does not make me want to end it all as much as the list we are about to go through.
Content: 2/10
Presentation: 1.5/10
Humor: 1/10
Urge to End it All: 0.5/10
#10 – Dr. Fauci’s Girlfriend
Dr. Fauci is the only person whose legion of sycophants could rival those of Governor Andrew Cuomo. His face appears on pillows, magazine covers, mugs, etc. This video starts out our countdown on a mild start. It’s kind of funny if you ignore most of it, and it’s not nearly as bad as the upcoming videos.
However, seeing as this woman actually bought a Dr. Fauci pillow… I recommend she seek psychiatric help.
Content: 1/10
Presentation: 1/10
Humor: 0/10
Urge to End it All: 0.5/10
#9 – California Crazy
Hamilton was a marker for the inevitable decline of Western civilization and this just proves it. Also, this woman is a teacher. Yikes.
Content: 1/10
Presentation: 1/10
Humor: 0/10
Urge to End it All: 0.5/10
#8 – The Cult of the Vaccine Slut
Because nothing says “I’m a grounded and normal human being” quite like sitting in the grass, drinking wine, and professing your willingness to slut it up for Big Pharma, amirite?
Content: 1/10
Presentation: 1/10
Humor: 0/10
Urge to End it All: 2/10
#7 – Accents
Terrible impressions aside, the underlying message here is overwhelmingly negative and depressing. The whole idea of emulating Band Aid ought to be to be uplifting, but mentioning “dread and fear” is just.. ugh. Pretty sure this woman just wanted to stand in front of a camera and look pretty for 60 seconds… which I guess she accomplished. Kinda.
Content: 2/10
Presentation: 2.5/10
Humor: 1/10
Urge to End it All: 3.5/10
#6 – I’ll Put A Mask On You
I hate Halloween movies, so this is probably my own bias showing. However, the absolute nonsense that is the people shooting this video NOT wearing masks in their big groups and then putting them on defeats the purpose. Like, if you actually cared about whether or not people wore a mask, you’d be wearing them all the time.
Again, this is virtue-signalling nonsense, the musical quality is so-so, and I hate Halloween themed anything.
Content: 0.5/10
Presentation: 4/10
Humor: 0/10
Urge to End it All: 5/10
#5 – Vaccine Hoochie
I will never understand women thinking calling themselves sluts is somehow a liberating experience, but here we are. At least we know she’ll let Big Pharma put whatever they want to in her ass, which is honestly more than I’d ever cared to know about a perfect stranger in my life.
Make Bullying Great Again
Content: 0/10
Presentation: 0/10
Humor: -5/10
Urge to End it All: 7/10
#4 – Vaccine Queen
I hope you appreciate the fact that I have had to watch each one of these videos multiple times in order to write anything coherent about them. While I admit the vocals are better, I don’t care for ABBA, and I think calling oneself a “Vaccine Queen” is just about the dumbest thing a person could do.
I’m getting major theater kid vibes. Sorry to all my theater kids out there.
(No I’m not.)
Content: 1/10
Presentation: 3/10
Humor: 0/10
Urge to End it All: 8.5/10
#3 – Frozen 3: Vaccination Day
The little-known sequel in the Frozen series is a dud. I mean, really. It’s just a dud. The vocals are terrible, the fear-mongering is borderline psychotic, and the clear preference for which vaccine he gets is a combination straight out of hell.
Contrary to the last line, I’m quite certain being alone is exactly what happens next for him.
Content: 1/10
Presentation: 1/10
Humor: 0/10
Urge to End it All: 10/10
#2 – Covid-19 The Musical
Another Frozen-style musical about Covid, this time complete with a journey into the uncanny valley. The mixture of the face filter and the pathetic nature of locking oneself down for over a year because the government said so is almost too much to bear. At least the vocals are somewhat better than the previous guy, but my word this is just… sad.
Content: 0/10
Presentation: 4/10
Humor: 0/10
Urge to End it All: 13/10
#1 – Fauci the Snowm- I Mean… Doctor
This video is the reason why I see a therapist. The music is awful. The facial expressions are God awful. The fact that this video was made in CHRISTMAS TIME of 2020 means these two bimbos have no clue what a cretin Dr. Fauci really is and have bothered to do zero research to find out.
And what’s with the nose picking at the beginning? WHY? WHY MAKE THIS?
Content: -10/10
Presentation: -20/10
Humor: -∞/10
Urge to End it All: 1000/10
In Conclusion
If you made it to the end, congratulations. You’re just as much of a masochist as I am. Or by writing this, does that make me a sadist? Or both?
I don’t know, and I don’t care.
This past year and a half has showed us all-too-well just how insane people truly are. At least they’re willing to upload it online so we can make fun of it!
Talk soon,
L
PS: I’m serious about not killing myself. If anything ever happens to me, I didn’t do it, and I blame Bill Gates.
PPS: If you’re on Twitter, follow @LibsofTikTok. It’s a hell of a ride, but it’s funny. Also help me peer pressure them to join Gab. 🙂
Jetemy says
#5. Notice the shirt. Animal heads on human bodies.
Jake says
“If anything ever happens to me”
Don’t want any of that, get boobytraps or make sure your neighbors have your back if you need to. It’s about time that people fortified themselves to prevent being on the deep state’s “suicide list”.
Juju says
Hmmm…perhaps we should be glad these people you’ve presented here are getting the shots. I’ve been reading quite a bit about concerns that they can cause sterility, as in THE “VAXED” WILL NOT BE ABLE TO REPRODUCE. (wink wink). I don’t like to wish bad things on people, but maybe, in the long run, it’s best we just cheer this group on. Just sayin’.
Slick says
I think most of those featured wouldn’t be reproducing with or without a covid squirt.
Nobody says
You should add a cringe rating to them as well….
Ian says
You totally did it! They actually joined gab lol!
dal7910 says
If I was a parent to any of these fools & had paid for their college, I would be demanding my money back.
Sadhu says
You have a serious problem in the US.
Capt. Howdy says
After watching or rather sampling these um… “pieces” of… frontal lobe washings I find myself looking to the skies and hoping for the savior comet.
Catherine Hazur says
These made the Twerking Nurses of TikTok look like Rhodes Scholars. Have we hit rock bottom yet?
BobF says
Never underestimate the intelligence of the American people – it simply cannot be done!
Dwayne Diesel says
What did I just watch? I’m having that moment the yellow MM&M had when he saw Santa- they do exist.
I heard of these people. Knew Tik Tok was a playground but I liked it better when my vision of them wasn’t validated.
And I never knew so many people are willing to make fools of themselves fir tge world to see.
Bimbette Bobo says
They were just silly TikTok videos. That’s all. What is crazy is you think you do real research.
BobF says
Wow – while I appreciate the effort to compile this horror show, I regret that I cannot unsee most of those videos…